It is the dream of every white person to be able to resolve all conflicts by complaining to unrelated parties.

You don’t have to be white to be white, you just have to be rich.

Since white people can’t really blame any race for their problems, they need to blame corporations.

Right now, all white people are either wearing or coveting a pair of Ray-Ban Wayfarer sunglasses. These sunglasses are so popular now that you cannot swing a canvas bag at a farmer’s market without hitting a pair. In fact, at outdoor gatherings you should count the number of Wayfarers so you can determine exactly how white the event is. If you see no Wayfarers you are either at a country music concert or you are indoors.

The process of reading is somehow heightened through the process of doing it near water. Extreme reading!

When it comes to the subject it's best to understand thatwhite people do not recognize public transit as a viable option until a subway line is built that runs directly from their house to their work.

All white people are born with a singular mission in life in order to pass from regular whitehood into ultra-whitehood. Just as Muslims have to visit Mecca, all white people must eventually renovate a house before they can be complete.

If you look into the footnotes of the business model for Apple Computer you'll see that they actually give the computers away for free; they just charge for the inflated sense of self-worth.

You don't have to be white to be white, you just have to be rich.

It is the dream of every white person to be able to resolve all conflicts by complaining to unrelated parties. Because of this, white people are able to endure years of frustration and anger without saying a word in the hopes that everything will just work itself out without having to make a scene.